We have a very well-stocked toolbox. I say "we" because it is in our garage, but my husband is the boss of our tools. It's not a gender role/stereotype thing. He likes the tools, he knows how to use the tools, and I have a tendency to make whatever needed to be fixed more in need of fixing when I use the tools.
For example, I cannot use the air compressor to inflate tires. I am incapable of making it latch on correctly, and I end up letting air out of the tire instead of putting air into the tire. Then I let out even more air when I use the tire gauge to check how much air I let out in the filling process. It's pretty much a disaster every time I use the air compressor. I am worse with a drill.
So, today I needed a hammer. (If Dale is reading this, he just got very frightened.) The hammers in the toolbox are too large and heavy for me to wield with much accuracy (let's blame it on the size of the hammer). Seriously, those hammers make my hands hurt. And before you shout out the obvious, I tried using a hairbrush as a hammer. This time, it didn't work. When did they start making hairbrushes so fragile they cannot be used as hammers?
So, after demolishing a perfectly good hairbrush, I remembered that I have a hammer. MY hammer. It's smaller, lighter, it fits in my hand, and I can swing it (sort of). It's not the kind of hammer that would help in the actual building of anything, unless you are interested in building with thumbtacks. It is, however, perfect for driving garden spikes into the ground and for hanging lightweight pictures on the wall. Yep. Very fond of that hammer, and I'm glad we have it in the toolbox.
In life, we use tools. I have it on good authority* that having inadequate tools to deal with life's challenges is a bad thing. I've also heard (same good authority) that being "one tool shy of a full toolbox" is kind of a drag as well. As I think about whether or not my children have the tools they need in life, I pray we're using the right tools to teach them. Some situations call for compassion. Some call for drawing a hard line. Sometimes we play devil's advocate. Sometimes we are human shields.
I don't always pick up the correct tool; there have been some disastrous results. And there have been times I may have picked up the right tool but applied it incorrectly. Again, not great results. I'm thankful Dale and I had great parents who taught us, by example, how to use the tools we have. Also, we've been blessed to meet some extraordinary people who have shared their parenting tools with us. In addition, we can credit good churches and a school or two with some help along the way. (Truly, it takes a village to stock a toolbox.)
People need a really good set of tools as they make their way through life. I want my children to have more than a passing acquaintance with the tools they've been given, I want them to make wise choices when adding to their toolboxes, and I especially want them to make wise choices in picking and using tools. And if they make good choices, it will be obvious they get their tool sense from their dad.
*Thank you for your professional input, good authority person. You know who you are.
1 comment:
The first and most impressive part of this post is that it was finished at 5:34 am. For someone who prefers sunsets over sunrises this is awe-inspiring! So unless your blog has a timer much like my coffee pot, you are enjoying a marine type of day already!
Tools are helpful to accomplish a specific task but even more important is an understanding of the goal one is trying to accomplish. I think that is the jest of the verse found in Proverbs 22:6: Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not turn from it. You can tell and show your child to use the claw of a hammer to pull a nail but they will use their teeth, it just happens. I’m not sure if it is their curiosity, their independence or something they saw on an episode of MacGyver but they are determined to find another way (not that I am speaking from experience or anything).
Your kids have observed two parents with a desire to “do a job right.” They have seen things that work and things that don’t but in the end what matters is that they understand consequences and see grace modeled often.
The most important and least used tool is the owners manual (not that I am speaking from experience or anything). In that manual we learn the “how to’s” and the “how not to’s” and it is full of trouble shooting scenarios if a tool is not working properly. We should refer to it often but honestly most of the time it is rarely opened. Knowing the manual and encouraging young users to know and use the manual is the greatest gift we can give.
I keep hearing the Donnie McClurkin song: STAND
What do you do when you've done all you can and it seems like it's never enough? And what do you say when your friends turn away and you're all alone? Tell me, what do you give when you've given your all
And it seems like you can't make it through? Well you just stand When there's nothing left to do You just stand Watch the Lord see you through Yes after you done all you can, You just stand
At some point we have to defer our anxieties concerning our building process and trust the Builder! -DC
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